Thursday, May 23, 2019

Thursday Morning

Good morning to all of you.

For whatever reason I found the courage to open the computer this morning to the blog. I am not really sure what to say. I reread the last posting along with the comments. The comments were all great and should have been the basis of further discussion. Yet, for some reason I was not in a mood to talk about them. I looked briefly at the I'm Hers blog. He also has been in something of a funk.
I have not yet found the courage to open emails, but I imagine there are hundreds of them.

Over the years I have written and written about femdom. In the very beginning it was a mystery to me. In simplest terms there are some men who need a lady in their life to tell them what to do.
She can be a wife, a girlfriend, an adult daughter or even a paid professional. And, over the years, I have discovered that some men are more submissive than others. On a scale of one to ten my husband is a ten plus. Does that mean I love him any less. The answer is no. It does mean, however, that I need to be aware of his special needs and structure our relationship in such a way that we both can be happy living as a couple.

One of the special things about our relationship is the intensity of the femdom dynamics. My introduction to femdom was anything but gradual. In a very short time the studio experience gave me a graduate level look into the minds of submissive men. The big questions I had to answer for my self was could I love a submissive man and secondarily could I live with one. The answer for me was yes, but that is not true for all women. Over the years there have been many women who have written to me to say they have tried it, but it simply doesn't work for them.

At the moment I am not sure where the blog is going or even if it will continue. I have written as much as one person should write about a subject. The core message of Femdom 101 is that femdom is about love and caring. Yes, there can be a place for punishment and even for spanking, but the core message is still about love, commitment, and understanding. Some of you may recall a posting from the early years of the blog regarding a woman who brought her husband to the studio for over night kenneling. She would arrive by taxi all dressed up for a night out on the town. She would then deliver her leashed husband to one of the mistresses. The story was that she had an over night date with her lover, and wanted her husband out of the way until morning. At the time I wondered what type of a man would put up with something like this.

About a year ago this woman contacted me on the blog. What she told me was that there was no lover. Her husband needed something she could not give him. The way out for her was to make up a story and let the paid mistresses handle him for the evening. She would then make up a story about what a good lover she had. As she did not want to talk about her husband with a friend most of these evenings out were spent by her self alone in a movie theater. She could not be the mistress or the so called hot wife her husband needed, but she found a way to keep him happy. When the studio closed she actually hired a young woman to serve as his mistress. She tells me that her husband loved the humiliation of having his wife deliver him into the hands of a mistress.

A novice might ask why did this woman do this. The answer is simple. She loved him, and he needed something she was not prepared to give. What I do believe the world needs is more younger woman who are prepared to take the reigns of their marriage in hand and lead their families to a healthier life style. The so-called new age male is more than willing to give up the traditional role of family leadership for the privilege of living under female authority. In fact he craves it.

Love you all for reading.

Love Kathy


I'm-Hers said...

I may be in a bit of a writing funk but seeing that you posted brought a huge smile to my face. Always love reading your thoughts. Love you as a friend for being the strong woman you are :)

Anonymous said...

From a male perspective, the best argument for femdom might well be to look at what "alpha" males have been wasting their life on. They often watch sportsball while eating nachos and cheese, wearing the jersey of their favorite player, even though all that does is help pay for the player's millionaire playboy lifestyle. These "alpha" males glorify the American military, might even be actual servicemen, but the reality to anyone with half a brain is that the military only exists to fight wars on behalf of Israel, not the national interest, while lying through their teeth about these wars. A major crowning achievement of masculinity is supposedly once putting man on the moon, yet 50 years later NASA is trying to still figure out how to overcoming the Van Allen belts and recently spent 11 years perfecting a parachute system for re-entry to Earth. This is why the phrase "toxic masculinity" was coined. It is time for us men to stop investing in phony symbols of masculinity, humbly acknowledge that we just don't know what we are doing, and let our women grab the wheel. The best place place to begin is at home.


Tiptease said...

Thank you Kathy for this post. This is just what you learned your readers, its all about love and caring. Maybe I may give you some direction for your blog, for me it doesnot have to be about heavy topics, just an insight about your daily femdom relation will be great and that includes the vanilla stuff, because we understand its not Always "kinky".

What you have given me is that i learned that FLR exists at a level desirable for many submissives, you gave me hope and the courage to open up to my wife.

I will Always thank you for this and hope you continue your blog.

Withe regards Tiptease

Anonymous said...

Good to see you back Miss Kathy. I understand what you mean by this. My wife also gives things that I know she doesn't want to do. As we get older we are set in our ways and when one gives to the other like how you mentioned one has to realize how much love there is with those 2. We have been working at the flr lifestyle for at least 40 years. Nothing is perfect but we both try and work hard at making this work for both of us. Chastity has played a great role in our lifestyle by not letting self gratification on my psrt. I would never cheat on her and she wouldn't on me, I trust her completely. Thanks for your part in the learning of this lifestyle and I have been with you since your beginning. I don't know what your followers including me would do if you ever quit. You are quite an expert with your knowledge and experience that you have shared. Don't give up know. Thanks for all you do. Firefighter Steve

Unknown said...

Great to see You back posting. Your blog has been a great inspiration and insight to me.Hope You and john are both in good health and still enjoying your FLR lifestyle. Please keep posting and sharing your experiences with us lesser and probably envious mortals.

All best wishes, humble john xxx

Anonymous said...

I hope that you continue with the blog, I very much enjoy reading it and I like its message, that femdom is about love and caring. That is certainly the case with my partner and me. Her domination is very mild, she is not into some things that I find interesting (bondage, for example). However, I am not interested in being dominated by anyone else. A minor act of dominance by her, for example when she swats my bottom for being inattentive, means more to me than intense session with a professional ever could. Thank you!


Anonymous said...

Ms Kathy

I really missed you. I wished I knew if you did too.

Anonymous said...

A talking to by my wife is the best treatment for me. Wife in charge makes life so much easier. Granted those "talking to" get my attention and last sometime after I agree I need them. One thing is for sure, women could care less how much you squirm, plead, beg, the spankings continues until she feels you have learned your lesson. At first I thought she would enjoy seeing my erection, oh so wrong, that was gone quickly and afterwards facing the wall, she enjoys viewing her work. I accept, I wanted and most of all needed such a wife.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Stewart; I hope that you continue with this blog. Other FLR blogs tend to come across as too harsh, disregarding the loving aspect of a healthy FLR. Or over emphasize kink, even though a couple will spend most of their time in a vanilla ambience.


Anonymous said...

As Femdom seems to be in an experimental stage...a stage where it is still evolving...I doubt that this topic has been exhausted. There may still be quite a bit to write about.


Anonymous said...

I have occasional conversations with a co-worker who tends to volunteer details of her personal life.

During our latest conversation she commented that she is an "Alpha", and that she has "butted heads" with family members of both genders.

She is friendly, and I can easily imagine her drawing males into her orbit.

As she volunteered the use of the word "Alpha", I have to wonder if this term might become common for Dominant Women.


Anonymous said...

It occurred to me that I should clarify the use of the term "Alpha".

Vanessa Van Edwards uses the term "Alpha", but in regards to interactions between women.

In a femdom context I see an "Alpha" as a natural take-charge-type with a strong will. Such a woman would naturally tend to dominate men.


Anonymous said...

I hope Women adopt the term Alpha. It's so much cleaner and more family oriented than all the now porn words... I think we need Femdom to evolve from a fetish to a loving, everyday lifestyle that is as much about love as it is about non-equality between the sexes.

Anonymous said...

My latest conversation with my Alpha co-worker led to the topic of shorter women. Self described as being short, my co-worker talked about the difficulties that shorter women have in reaching the higher cupboards in the kitchen. She especially emphasized the cupboard above the refrigerator.

She believes that taller women-which she refers to as "Amazon women"-have an easier time of it.

As more short women enter Femdom relationships, I can guess who will be assigned the task of reaching higher cupboards.

(BTW, I think that the one above the refrigerator is an awkward reach for anybody.)