Friday, January 19, 2018

The Me Too Movement

Over the last couple of months there have been so many wonderful emails from the readers of the blog. Not being active on the blog has provided me with the time to connect with many of you on an individual basis, and it has been good experience for me. And, what I can see is that many of you are suffering. Your need for a confident lady who can take control of your life and guide you to the reality of  femdom life is real. I wish that it would be possible for me to take each and every one of you by the hand and say that it will all be fine. There are some of you who are struggling to find meaning in your lives. The type of meaning that only comes from service to a loving mistress who owns the keys to your heart. My only regret is that I can not be that mistress, but my feeling is that she is out there somewhere.

Like most other people I have been fascinated with the 'me to movement.' As a young woman, many years ago, in a male dominated field there were instances of harassment. As a young accountant in public practice you are required to visit clients. We would generally travel in teams of two or three. There would sometimes be overnight travel, and this is where the problems  generally occured.
After a long day of reviewing spread sheets and reconciling numbers there was always a need for a cocktail. We usually worked until late in the afternoon, and then headed for the hotel bar. If not for the evening drink we probably would have going crazy.

With everyone being on an expense account we generally found a nice restaurant for dinner. It was after dinner that the problems would develop. Not with all of the men, but with a couple of them. It would start with a flirtatious smile or look or even a hand discreetly placed on your leg under the table cloth. Women who have been in business with men know and understand what it is I am talking about. Most of us have experienced this type thing, and for our generation it was just part of working in a male dominated field. It was something we were taught to accept. To keep from offending the men we practiced ways of saying no with a smile. This was especially true when the gentlemen who strategically placed his hand on your leg was also responsible for writing an evaluation report of your performance. As women in business we were powerless.

In a way the so called 'me too 'movement has disrupted my thinking regarding the blog. As all of you know the blog is centered on the home and family. It is about female authority in the home, not the work place. It has always been my thinking that femdom marriage would be the next frontier. Think about it for a few moments. In the 1920s women were first allowed the right to vote. In the 1960s or 70s most minority groups gained legal protection. And finally homosexuality has become legal as well as socially acceptable.  What is left is femdom marriage and the world of men who are submissive to women. While this is legal it is not yet socially acceptable.

In a sense the speed and broad social support associated with the me too movement has brought it front and center of the national debate. No, I take  that statement back. Regarding the me too movement there is no debate. Men who have abused women or who have been accused of abusing women are punished. They are fired from their jobs. They are ridiculed and scorned by a society that only a few years back had no interest in the claims made by these women. The me too philosophy has eclipsed femdom as a social movement.  Along with the me too movement most large corporations are searching for women to replace men on their boards of directors. A major  morning talk show is now cohosted by women. On that show there are women talking with each other. There is no longer a need or a place for a male voice except as filler. It all reminds me of the lyrics of the song, 'I am woman hear me roar'. This time, however, the roar is real and it is loud.

Becky works for a fairly large national company. While they are not looking to promote less qualified women over males, they say, they are actively looking for more female leadership in most management positions. 'How do the men feel about that', I asked her. 'Most of them don't like it' she replied, but they have little choice if they want to stay with the company. She has also noticed a change in the demeanor of the men. Some of them who have a reputation for being kind of flirty have become less so, she told me. There is a growing sense among her female coworkers that the men no longer know how to act. Any thing they do, she tells me, can be interpreted in a negative way. There is a salesmen who would some times give her a hug. No more she tells me. And yes, she misses the hugs and some of the jokes that would make the work day go a little faster.

Sometime during the last week or two I read an on line article that said we are moving toward a puritanical society. Men and women are different, and it is those differences that add color and excitement to our lives. Yes, and at my age I sometimes wish a man would pinch my rear end. It would probably be the highlight of my week. Just teasing, but there is some truth in that statement.
My feeling is that we are moving toward a color blind society where there is a rule or social protocol for every situation. And, instead of being judged by the whole of what we are or the what we have accomplished, we are judged by any random headline that happen to have our picture on it. Men are afraid. In today's work culture women have the power. As they are promoted over male counterparts they will also have the authority. The men who will be successful in this new environment are those who have learned to be pleasing to the women around them.

An unintended consequence of the movement is that it is placing power in the hands of women. By way of a single comment a  secretary can just about derail the career of almost any executive. Becky, who is close to one of the human relations people in her firm tells me that management considers women as safer and more reliable than their male counterparts. Her concern is that it is becoming more difficult for men to secure better jobs, and even more difficult for them to be promoted as each and every male employee is looked on as something of a potential time bomb. 'Do you every worry about David', I asked her. 'You know mom David is the quintessential new age man that you talk about', she replied. She went on to say that he would never do or say anything that was inappropriate. 'Neither would your father' I reminded her, but in today's work environment it is women who are determining what is appropriate. The simple reality is men do not know if an action or behavior is right or wrong, offensive or not until it is judged by female standards. This, I told Becky, is leaving men in a very vulnerable place.

While I don't know everything, what I do see happening is that the changes in the work place are occurring at lighting speed. It is now common for men to work under female supervisors. Women are being promoted over men in the work place, and they are receiving comparable salaries. And, the biggest change of all is that men who are not complying with the new standards of conduct are finding them selves in the unemployment line.

For the moment I am not sure what the 'me to movement' means for society or for female led marriage. What I do suspect is that men who are accustomed to working under the supervision of women will have no problem with accepting female control in the home. And women who are accustomed to supervising men in the work place will think it normal to supervise their husbands in the same manner. Instead of femdom marriage spreading to the work place, I am beginning to see a world that is run by and controlled by women moving from the work place to the home.

Let me hear your thoughts on this topic.

Love, Kathy

Saturday, December 2, 2017

Follow Up

Once again thank all of you for contributing to the blog by way of comments and emails. There was an email from a young wife who is in the early stages of a female led relationship. What seemed to interest her the most was Command Position. 'Is it really possible to train a man to drop to the floor at the snap of your fingers', she asked. 'Yes', I responded, 'if he is truly submissive and is willing to give up control'. Trying Command Positon that evening she was amazed by the fact that her husband not only obeyed as directed, but showed eager willingness for more of the training. 'Who would ever think', she responded the next day. Her comment made me laugh. Between personal experiences and that of  the studio my observation has been that men love to be put under the physical control of a lady by this simple method. With daily drills, over weeks and months, men become conditioned to watching the hands of their mistress and following her non verbal commands. If you sometimes give your man a small treat for responding he will most probably learn faster. I believe the psychologist refer to this as operant conditioning.

After the first day or two this young wife discovered the amazing power that this simple technique of command Position provides to the mistress wife who is willing to use it. The key is repetition so both he and she become accustomed to the act. And yes, it may be in a gentle way, but men do fear a woman who is willing to discipline them with this tool. In the studio we used a variant of this  technique for a number of purposes. In a public situation it can make a man squirm. To help over come my own hesitation Tara reminded me on more than one occasion that it is the 'male' who must drop on command, not you. In other words there was nothing for the lady giving the command to be embarrassed about. As a studio helper it took me some time to get acquainted with the idea that this command should some times be given in a public venue. The men were taught that the longer the time to respond, the longer mistress would keep them in that self comprising position. Tara would sometimes take men on walks wearing 't' shirts that had the words 'her slave' printed on back and front.  Humiliation, especially in public, would send some men into a deep state of sub space where they would do practically anything. Why, I don't know, but I have seem it first hand.

Reading over the last postings John was a little surprised over how quickly they were written.
What I have found is that when writing about a subject that you are passionate about-care about- the words come easy, and the flow is natural. As much as I write many of you still do not understand how John and I live. For the record I am not some type of princess who relaxes all day while my husband slaves away in the house. Yes, he may do the majority of the house work, but I also do a fair amount. On Friday morning John makes me happy when he cleans the mistress bedroom and bathroom and changes the bed sheets. It is really our bedroom, but the mistress bedroom sounds much better on a femdom blog. And, I believe it provides John with a very good feeling to be  put in charge of taking care of our personal space.

But what many of you don't get is that John also makes me happy when he comes back from his golf game all smiles and lovey. Yes, I like my guy to get out the house, get fresh air, and stay active with male friends. But, my guy also understands that golf is a privilege that can be taken away from him if circumstances suggest a need to it. In the morning John makes me happy when he comes into my study with a cup of coffee. A little cream and very little sugar. A good slave knows how his mistress likes her coffee, and John is the best slave a mistress could ever own can. Some of you who are wondering whether the coffee service comes with a polite curtsy. Is there anything wrong with a husband curtsying to his wife. Is it an activity that some would describe as BDSM or is it a simple act of respect and devotion? That is a question for each of you to decide, but I love to see a man curtsy to his lady. For me it is a lovely gesture full of grace and beauty that says a great deal about the character of a man as well as his respect for women-especially those who are in authority over him.

Love, Kathy

Wednesday, November 22, 2017

Thanksgiving 2017

Thank all of you for the love and support during the year.

It is my hope this this blog has made some positive contribution to the lives of each and every one of you. For most men the femdom lifestyle creates challenges, but also adds to the richness of their lives. The same can be said for women, but the challenges and the rewards are different.

For women as well as men femdom offers a lifestyle of both commitment and of deep intimacy. A style of life which is truly unique and pleasing in varied ways. As Becky said we disconnected from the way we used to live and never looked back. And, 'do you ever regret it', I asked. 'No mom, we never regretted it' was the response. 'Yes, there were challenges to overcome', she told me, 'but the relationship is really based on caring'. 'Too much emphasis is placed on the idea of punishment' she once said to me.

One of things we agreed on was that the various blogs place far too much emphasis on the wife's obligation to punish. Yes, a wife's willingness to punish is a part of femdom, but so is love and caring. A submissive husband who demonstrates devotion to his wife and family on a day to day basis is a treasure. A husband who values intimacy is a special angel whom a woman can connect with in a spiritual as well as physical way.

Most of the blogs dwell on the obligations of the husband to his wife. What the blogs seem to neglect is the role of the husband as a father and role model for children. Even men with adult daughters want to keep the idea that mom is  head of family and his personal mistress as some sought of national secret. Why, I ask men such as I'm hers and others who openly blog about femdom's positives but neglect to share with their adult children. Femdom is not about sex unless you want to make it that way. Why is it that so many men want to deny that sense of richness to their adult children.

Having a an openly submissive father in law was the stimulus for David coming out to Becky. Even for them the transition from vanilla to femdom was a challenge. One day, Becky says, that femdom may become almost as vanilla as apple pie and ice cream, but she acknowledges that day is still far into the future. Becky reads the blog. What she tells me is that I put too much emphasis on the bristled hairbrush. She says I should talk more about how the children love David-how he tells them stories and how he plays with them. And yes, she says, the children do see David as well as her as authority figures in their lives. The difference in femdom is that the family is put ahead of work, ahead of sports on the television, and other distractions that tend to isolate fathers from the family. This is a part of femdom that each of you should give special thought to over the upcoming holidays.

In Becky's home David is not allowed to turn the television on without  permission. This is true for  sports programs as well as cartoons for the children. In her opinion the television should not be used as a baby sitter. She favors active activities for the children rather than the passivity of siting in front of a TV screen. David respects and supports her decision in this matter as well as other decisions about how the home is run. Does she give him a say, yes. Does she value his opinion, yes. Is the final decision on all household matters hers, yes. Is David expected to support her on all decisions, yes. And, like most men does David sometimes pout? Yes, Becky tells me. And, how does she handle pouting. A quick snapping of the fingers putting him in Command Position usually does the trick she says. The best way to handle male poutines in most homes  is simply by reminding the guy that you are the boss. There is no easier way to remind your guy of your authority than by putting him in Command Position. Becky will use a word or two with this tool, but there is generally no need to scream of shout. The simple physical act of falling to the floor upon the wife's command is usually enough to put an end to any pouting or rebellion. In the home submissive men want to be assured that female authority is supreme. Enough said.

On a visit to their home last year a sister asked David if they could turn on the television for the children. 'I will ask Becky' he replied to the sister. The sister now understands that Becky not David is the person to ask. 'Does this bother David', I ventured . 'No', was the reply. She went on to say that David has no problem with letting his family know that his wife makes the decisions and controls the household finances. He has learned to be what she calls a proud submissive man. In some ways this is the new age male that we have occasionally talked about on the blog. Yes, he acknowledges 'She' controls his permissions, and is proud to offer that they both want it that way. It is not something that 'She' forces on him. And, for David she always comes with a capital 'S' for she is his his mistress; the woman he lives to serve, and the love of his life. What I suspect is that many young men would be tremendously envious of the life he lives under Becky's control. Is there a sexual component of femdom? Yes, of course. Is femdom about sex? No, not really, at least in my view. And, as support for this is my belief that many men become more submissive with age as the sex drives tends to diminish.

One of the things Becky loves to see is young fathers carrying diaper bags and feeding their children in public spaces. No, they can't breast feed, but they can give the bottle, and mistress wives should expect their husbands to do more of this she tells me. This is not the type of activity that makes for exciting femdom reading, or causes Alex to melt, but it is a reality of femdom life. Femdom is not just about foot messages. Yes, as in spankings there may be foot messages from time to time, but giving these is more of a male priority that something that most wives crave or even have time for.
What femdom is about is a way of life in which a wife has control over her husband. Her decisions determine what is right for him and what is wrong for him. Her decisions determine what church the family will attend and when. She may also determine more mundane matters such  as what television programs to watch. For the deeply submissive husband she may in fact become the earthly representative of his God. A husband's simple curtsy to his wife is kind of a symbol of her spiritual presence in his life. She is only a person, but to him She is often something of a goddess.

For all of you in America it is my hope that you have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday.
Your wife may not be the mistress of your dreams, but she is the lady that you chose to marry. Remember to honor her on this holiday. There is more to Thanksgiving than turkey and football.

Love you for reading. Love you even more for sharing.


Thursday, November 16, 2017

A Sense Of Fear...More About Tough Love

One of the things that I appreciate about the blog is the diversity of the comments. While it is true that a blog with a name like Femdom 101 will tend to attract submissive men, these men come with a range of ideas and feelings.

In my opinion femdom should never be about catering to a husbands every want. The wife should never become the psychological servant of her husband, but admittedly there is a danger of this happening. The simple truth is that most women agree to a femdom relationship at the request of their spouse. It is very seldom that a wife suggest to her husband that she should take the lead in their marriage. This so called lack of enthusiasm by the wife is what tends to complicate the entire concept. Is it the wife trying to please her husband by catering to his wants or is it the wife demanding servitude from her man.

One of the things I learned from Tara was the importance of understanding the male's need for female control in everyday life. By everyday life I mean not just play time on Saturday morning, but a relationship where by the wife is in control of her man. On a daily basis she decides his permissions, determines his duties, his rewards and when necessary his punishments. And, regarding punishment I did say when necessary rather than if necessary. In my view a wife's willingness to punish is an absolute preset condition for a true femdom marriage.

In earlier posting we talked about having John eat pages from his magazines. His stash of these  offensive magazines was almost a foot high. In my view these magazines were offensive to women.
The magazines typically showed attractive women in skimpy outfits with naked men graveling at their feet. Typically the women held a whip of some kind in her hand. The magazines displayed no emotion except male fear of the superior female. It was never explained why the physically stronger male yielded to her punishment, but he always did. It bothered me that John was attracted to this type of trash. Based on the prices displayed on the covers these magazines were certainly not cheap.

The fact that his stack of old magazines was so high was testimony to the idea that he was in some way addicted to them. Most of the old ones were not thrown away. Lusting over these magazines was a 'want' of his. Was I going to indulge this want? The answer was a resounding no, but I also needed to make a point. And, for both of our sakes I understood that the point needed to be made in a very strong way.

The first thing I did was have him remove the magazines from the garage and carry them into the house. I then had him place the magazines on the coffee table front and center of the couch where anyone visiting could see them. Yes, I told him that visitors to our home, both men and women, would see them and they would know that the magazines were his. 'Would you like that', I asked John. 'No mistress' was the fearful answer. 'Are you sure', I repeated. The idea that friends, neighbors, and family would see these magazines was most fearful to him. I remember pressing the question harder and harder. 'You have permission to speak, tell me why you don't want visitors to see them'.
At that point in the conversation John began to stutter and became very fearful. His fear of what I was going to do or say was genuine. The more fear he showed the more powerful I felt. For a few minutes  my attitude resembled the whip wheeling dominatrix in the magazines. And, maybe like the female character in the magazine, I took some  pleasure in his anxiety.

The idea that anyone visiting our home would see those magazines was extremely humiliating for John. 'What should we do with them', I asked John. 'Throw them in the trash' he responded.
But honey, 'you spent so much money on these magazines. It would be ashamed to just throw them away', I replied. Of course, I wanted them out of the house almost as much as John did, but it was also necessary to drive home the concept of who was in charge.

From the large stash I pulled out two or three of the magazines. 'Go through the magazine with me' I told him. 'Tell me what you like about the pictures'. As we went thorough the first magazine I again asked him what he would like to do with it. 'Throw it in the trash' was his reply. 'Well, I guess we can do that' I told John.  I said it in the same teasingly manner as the way we talked in the studio. I then told him that it might be well for him to make double sure he wants to throw the magazines away. The conversation brought out much of his guilt to the surface. He was in what I would call mental agony. 'Lets make sure those dirty magazines don't leave a bad taste in you mouth', I said. 'Just so you are not tempted to buy more of them', I added.

 It was at that point I had him tear off the first page of one of the magazines, rip it into small pieces and eat it piece by piece. Page by page I had him tear off and rip up the remainder of the magazine before throwing it into the trash. Everyday we went through the same process until the stack was gone. There are readers who will suggest this was cruel as it was a most unpleasant experience for him. What I have learned is that there are times when a mistress wife must give her man unpleasant experiences. It may be eating the pages from a magazine, missing a sports match on television, or a painful spanking with a hard bristled hair brush. Even Becky, who still is new to the role of  mistress understands the importance of punishment in her marriage. Of even more significance she has learned the enormous power a woman has over a man-a man who may physically stronger but mentally under her control.

In those early days of femdom it was important for John to know that I still loved him. It was important for him to understand that my love for him was the primary reason for becoming his mistress. Yet, he also needed to understand that my control of his life was real and a permanent fixture in our marriage. In the beginning our life mirrored much of what happened in the studio. Back then I was more of a mistress than a wife. Over time, years, I learned to find a more workable balance between the competing roles of mistress and wife. Depending on John's attitude one side or the other of my personality would come to life on any given day. On a day to day basis it became John's job to please me. To do as much as possible to keep the sweet side of my personality in front of him.

Concluding a discussion with Becky she said 'I suppose that is what they mean by the term slave husband'. I thought a second and responded 'yes, I suppose it is'.

Love you for reading, love you for sharing.


Monday, November 13, 2017

A Sense Of Fear..Tough Love

Just a short note to thank all of you who were kind enough to post. Well, 'kind enough' may not be the best choice of words. Half of you believe that I am something of an angel while the other half consider me to be some kind of a devil in a red dress. What I believe is that the truth lies somewhere between the two extremes.

To a large extent the journey from soccer mom to mistress was one of the most difficult times of my life. By saying this I am not looking for sympathy. It left me angry, depressed, and with feelings of inadequately. The question continued to come back to me in ways that there was no good answer. Why, I asked, did John feel the need to find the dominance he needed by the hand of a paid mistress. The truth of course was simply that I would never understand. Many of you who read this blog have the same attitude toward your wife. You are afraid to open up to her. You compensate for your fear by searching other outlets. Some of you may resort to paid professionals, but most of you confine your needs to the internet. Most often you are searching for blogs much like this one.

Over the last few weeks commenters have made statements to the effect that my husband was at one time kenneled and that he was forced to eat some of the pages from his collection of femdom magazines. In a court of law I would probably have to plead guilty to these things and more. And if you think discussing these things with Becky was easy, well guess again. It is true that coming home I didn't know how to deal with John. I wanted him back in our home, and back in our bedroom, but. And, there was a big but because there had to be something of half way point between living away and returning to our bedroom.  How do you tell a man you are angry, but that you still love him. How do you tell a man he caused you so much pain, but you still love him. How do you forgive him and go on with life. How do you make sure he will never see another paid mistress again?

And, when all is said and done how do you deal with the remaining guilt. One way is to be the best mistress you can be. Firm, disciplined, and loving all at the same time. And yes, control the money and know what he is doing, and whom he is doing it with. Another way to handle the guilt is to share your story in the form of a femdom blog. To give courage to others to speak up. To help women understand what it means when their husband says I need you to control me. None of us are perfect. John understands that he messed up big time by going to Tara, and her girls. Back at home the kennel from the little shop in the By-water, and the magazines were meant as punishments. But these were  punishments that sent a message. 'You are mine, you belong to me. I am your mistress now and your only mistress'.

Some of you may think that I can be a nasty bitch, and on that score you are correct.

Love and Kisses,


Friday, November 10, 2017

A Sense of Fear

Growing up in a Catholic city I attended the nun's school as a child. We had all of the usual classes, but everything was infused with a sense of religion. One of the lessons we learned was that a fear of God was a good thing. Yes, of course, we should always strive to do the right thing for no other reason than it was what good Christian girls did. Yet, in the background was this thing about a fear of God and his retribution if we failed to honor his rules.  On Sunday mornings it was often this fear of God that gave me the inner courage to wake up early for mass. If it were not for fear of God there would have been many more Sunday mornings in which I would have elected to remain in bed.

It is now close to noon and john is finishing up his Friday chores. What I suspect is that John feels the same way about his chores as I did about missing Sunday mass. He wants to do what is expected of him because that is what good submissive husbands do. But also there is this fear of punishment. He may not be spanked, but John understands that his punishment for not doing chores will be very real. Fear of a mistress wife is a far cry from fear of God, but a mistress's punishment for disobedience will come much quicker.

The point of this posting is that a little fear of a wife is a good thing. David asked Becky to become his mistress. He understands that obeying her is the right thing to do, yet there are times when it is difficult. The natural fear a man has for violating his wife's commands is real. The bristled hairbrush on the nightstand serves as a reminder of his obligations. And,it serves as a symbolic reminder of his wife's authority. David, like John gave up his freedom when he asked Becky to become her submissive, and take charge of his life. The day she agreed to become his mistress she assumed an obligation to develop David into a better version of himself.

As Christian wives we have responsibilities to both our husbands and children. We do not believe in divorce. We believe it is out duty to understand our men and to the best of our ability structure an environment in which they can excel. For some of us this means becoming mistresses to our men. By doing so we create a structure in which they can be better husbands and better fathers.

It is not that we are better than our guys, or that we have a natural right to rule them. It is because as wives we have an obligation to develop their inner self in a way that only a wife can do. Yes, of course, Becky understood that becoming a mistress to her husband was a duty for her. It was never something she wanted or asked for, but it was there. It was thrust upon her by a loving husband who realized that he needed female authority in his life.

Love you for reading, love you even more for sharing,


Thursday, November 9, 2017

A Side Note

Once again a big thank you to all of those who were kind enough to share.

I believe it was Joel who asked an interesting question. Is femdom actually a good thing for the submissive male. In my opinion yes, it is a good thing, because femdom gives men something they not only want but need. A question than becomes does it make them overly dependent on the lady who owns them. And yes, over time femdom does seem to cause a great deal of dependency.  If femdom is with the 'right' lady my thinking it is fine. There is potential for abuse. After a time a so called life partner may no longer have her submissive mans best interest at heart. And, the potential for financial abuse is apparent to all.

One of the commentates mentioned how his pay check is quickly removed to a bank account in which he has no control. Most mistress wives consider every penny their husbands earn as their property to do with as they wish. I agree with this philosophy. There is no valid reason for a man to have access to any type of bank account. If the need for money comes up for whatever reason he should ask his wife. It then becomes her decision. And there are situations where by a husband may need money for one reason or the other. It may be to help an elderly parent, or to help family members with college expenses. In difficult situations the wife should listen, but in the end all financial decisions are hers.

Femdom provides the truly submissive man with the kind of life he wants and needs. This is not to say there will be total happiness in the land of Valhalla.( Did I spell that word correctly, I am not sure.) Femdom is not about giving a man all that he wants. Yes, in the beginning he wants to serve his lady. After a year or so of making beds and scrubbing toilets the initial excitement of doing house work can turn into simple drudgery. Becky has learned that this is where discipline plays an important part in the relationship. With the word discipline I am talking about a systems of rules and protocols by which a man lives.

By discipline lets take a look at my John. Almost every day of the week he has some duties to perform in our home. Friday is his day to clean our bedroom, wash and change the bed sheets, vacuum, clean the mistress bathroom, and finally dust. Over the years John has accepted this as one of his household duties. Yet, he has been doing it for a long time. In the beginning there was a sense of excitement about performing this duty for his mistress. That same excitement may no longer  be there. In the real world of a mistress/slave relationship the question is how to  keep a man attentive to his duties?

For this mistress a big part of keeping her husband on 'track' is a careful inspection of his work.
The inspection will always come with a critique. And, in this home the husband understands that if his house hold work is not up to standards he will be doing it again. Our king size bed has a heavy mattress, and it is close to a large piece of  furniture. The end result is that changing the sheets is a bit of a difficult job, and John hates doing it. He also understands that if it is not done correctly I have no hesitation of pulling off the sheets for him to start over again. After one episode when the bedroom work was overly sloppy I had him change the sheets every day for a week.
I am not sure if you should call this discipline or punishment, but it caused him to do a better job of serving me. It also reminded him that even as an older man and a long term submissive he is still my slave. After years of training and discipline John understands that he is an owned man and will be so for the rest of his life.

In the early part of Becky's femdom relationship I encouraged her to give David more household duties. He is so busy she would tell me. Yes, he may be busy, but I suspected that he has time for more, and additional responsibilities would be good for both of you. And, what she did correctly was not only to give him more duties, but to pay attention to what he was doing. 'You know, mom, it helps a lot if I inspect his work', she told me. 'He takes more ownership of what he does when I do a careful evaluation,' I remember hearing. She also understood that inspection and evaluation made David's brain work in different ways. 'It makes him want to do what he is supposed to do', she once mentioned to me. She also told me that he feared the hairbrush with the stiff bristles. What I heard was that he will do almost anything to keep those hard bristles from coming down on his rear end.

Becky correctly understood that motivating David was a mixture of positive rewards combined with
a sense of fear. From an early age she understood that a man's sense of fear of his girlfriend, wife, or mistress was a good thing. In high school she learned to creat a sense of apprehension in boys by not returning calls or by having them wait while she got ready. As a mistress wife she quicly learned the value of a hairbrush in maintaining authority. It is very seldom that she has to use it, but the sight of it on her make up vanity is sufficient to send a daily reminder to David that she is still the boss. While this may seem cruel to some of you, Becky understands that this everyday reminder is a good thing for David because it is what he needs.

Love you all  for reading and for sharing,