Monday, August 28, 2017

Time Away

Just a quick note to thank all of you who have emailed over the summer months. Both John and I are fine. As most of you know John is retired. I made the decision to take the summer off from work. We spent most of June traveling in Europe and much of the remainder of the summer visiting with children.

It felt so good to be away from the responsibilities of work and to some extent the blog. In a way it felt good not to have the responsibility of posting. Over a few weeks of traveling I developed a mental block regarding computers. I just didn't want to touch a computer to either email, post, or simply to read the news.

Much of our time in Europe was in Italy. We rented a small apartment on a hillside outside of Sienna, and spent most of our time making day trips in the area. We also did a lot of walking. From the apartment we had to walk down the hill, but then go back up another hill in order to get into the town.
Sienna was interesting, but not as pretty as the renaissance cities of Italy. The Tuscany area with all of the little hill top towns was gorgeous, and we loved the wine and the food. We both took classes on Italian cooking. John, however, will tell you his favorite part of the class was eating what we cooked.

Where we go from here I am not sure. We did spent time with Becky and her family. She is as much a mistress to her husband as she has ever been. What I did notice is a renewed sense of confidence in herself. She is not afraid of leading. She is sweet and kind, always very feminine in manners and in the way she dresses, but she lets David know who is boss. And, I think this is an attribute that men generally value in a wife. More than every it is my belief that many- many men have a serious submissive side to their personality. It simply takes the right woman to bring it out where it can be developed.

Being on vacation relieved John of most of his work responsibilities. It also relieved me of some of the daily pressure of being a mistress. Yes, ladies, don't let anyone tell you that being a mistress is a job that comes with no responsibly. As time goes on the job of being a mistress becomes easier, but it can still be a job. What surprised me was how grumpy John could become on vacation. Letting the leash louse was fine for a few days, but to be happy John needs to feel the constant pull of my authority. Sometimes I wonder how many of you are like that?

After a few days of going collar free, I made him put it on. It may be difficult to imagine but it improved his attitude. Having the collar around his neck made him more obedient, more content, and a far better traveling companion. Men want to be collared. This may be one of the biggest secrets in the universe. Yet, even more than collared men want a lady who is willing to lock up their little 'thing-e' and keep the key.   'Thing-e' may not be an actual word, but yes you all know what it is.

Over the years I have had many emails from women. At the beginning the idea of being a man's mistress seems so strange. A couple of years into it most women tell how natural it feels to have a man under their control. Femdom is about love, about relationships, and about developing a sense of trust in each other. Sometimes I wonder how many of you are 'there' with your wife or girlfriend.
How many of you would fully trust the lady in your life with your freedom and as well as your money?

Love you all for reading and for sharing. We need to see where the blog goes from here. Over the next few weeks I will try to answer many of the email in my in box.



Dan - A Disciplined Hubby said...

Hi Kathy. Glad you're back. Sounds like a great vacation!


Anonymous said...

Dear Ms. Kathy,
So glad to see your post! I am approaching retirement, and my wife and I share many of the same values and experiences as you and your man. I hope my leash is never loose, and my collar is tight.

Anonymous said...

Ms. Kathy,

I am thrilled that after months, you posted on my birthday!


Anonymous said...

Ms. Kathy,

I love that you are travelling. So am I.

I couldn't agree with you more that sometimes what men need is to wear a collar and know that they are owned. I know it, don't ask me how please.

For a Woman, being in control is natural too. I am sure of it. I believe that is just the natural way and maybe some have not yet discovered that but once one gets a chance to be in touch with her inner self many truths come out, like this one.


Anonymous said...

Dear Mistress Kathy
What a wonderful surprise to see you back. I'm sure I speak for all of us when I say that we have missed you and your wise words and guidance. It is a horrible part of our nature as men that when we miss something we get grumpy, so I do understand your husband's behaviour, even if I don't condone it. We do crave those signs of authority from our Mistress wives. For my wife and I that means locking my thing-e up in a chastity cage. It is a constant reminder of her authority and of my devotion to her both mentally and physically. I have read that some women complain that locked up men become needy after being locked up for a month or so, constantly asking and begging to be let out. But my wife has one simple rule. I am not allowed to ask! Disobedience is not tolerated. And as being obedient is her number one requirement of me, I am content for her to decide when it is best for me to be let out - or not. It was a big mental and physical challenge for me to get over, but I have learnt that I get more satisfaction at her pleasure than I do from my own! Learning to be obedient is hard but your blog is wonderfully helpful, and that's why my wife gives me permission to read it.
Sissy Jenna

Anonymous said...

Mistress Kathy
Wonderful to hear from you and so happy to learn of your's and John's vacation. I checked your blog each day and missed your wisdom. Hopefully you will have some time to post in the future.

ALL HERS said...

My wife and I have had a femdom lifestyle for over 11 years now. It used to be a full time job for her to tell me what to do every day, what to cook for dinner, what housework to do, etc. After about 2 years we settled in to my being her full time slave better, I know what has to be done with housework, ironing her clothes, preparing dinners and giving her body massages and foot rubs. I just do it, she doesn't have to stand over me with a whip. ( Although nothing wrong with that). I get punished when I displease her, and am in chastity. She has only allowed me to cum once this year. I am never allowed in her, that is too great a privledge she says for a slave. In June, she was edging me one morning before we got out of bed, and she said " ,you have my permission to cum in your panties". I did within 10 seconds of her saying it.
I wer panties 24/7 and baby dolls to do housework. House work , I do twice a week. Since we live in Florida, my wife will go golfing with her friends those days , year round. She checks everything when she gets home, and if she finds something not to her liking, I get punished.
Regarding your experience on vacation, I too will sometimes lose focus and misbehave. My wife takes thin rope with her , and one punishment is that she will tie me tight to the shower head or door rail. Feet tied tight together. I am wearing only my panties.. She will give me 2 bottles of water to drink, then tell me I must ask permission to pee in my panties. I am left there for 2 hours or more while she watches tv, reads or naps. I ask for permission ,she denies me, then I cannot hold back any longer and I pee in them. She gets furious at me for disobeying her. Which leads to more punishments after we return home
This puts me back into my place usually for the rest of our vacation.

Anonymous said...

Ah! Ms. Kathy, I'm pleased to see your post, I discovered your blog just as you were beginning your summer break, but I've been checking for signs of activity.

Just to let you know, as & when you feel like posting, I will be delighted & interested.

Glad you both had a lovely summer.

Jake UK

Alex said...

Ms. Kathy,

Please, please come back!

Anonymous said...

There is a new blog called "" out there. It has much material about FLR. That blog wants FLRs to be implemented with authority and punishment, seeing such things merely as kink for the man's pleasure. It expects the men to automatically anticipate all of her needs and do something about them. If this is the direction of how FLRs are supposed to be going in the future it seems slightly naive viewpoint. What happens when he backslides or does not feel like it one day? It would seem that various punishments and real authority like financial control and sexual release are important tools to properly impose her will. Even corporations have authority. Your boss might welcome your opinion but if your opinion is too differing and pushed too hard, you might find yourself looking for another corporation.


James Theberge said...

Dear Ms. Kathy,

Thank you so much for your invaluable contributions to #newordergynarchy and #femdom in general. I am a male Female Supremacist and your blog gives me hope for the future and Womynkind. You are absolutely right when you say that Females in control is a natural position. As a male, I feel completely in tune with life when I am naked and on all fours in service to a Superior Female. As a gay male, my sexual orientation is irrelevant but my service to my Superior Female is very relevant. I also have a tumblr blog where I actively promote Female Superiority. You can look under the name "dakotaindian". I really try to politically promote the #newordergynarchy. Of course 99% of the content in the internet has to due with the sexual side of Femdom. Very little content promotes the political changes we need to make in order for the #newordergynarchy to happen. All of my service for my Dommes involves hard work in their domiciles cleaning. Of course, I am required to be naked while in service to Them. Occasionally I am rewarded with a crop or whip to my manhood and I leave fulfilled and happy.
You and your sub male give me hope.

Anonymous said...

My position is well known. Because Females are the superior sex, my position is that Females are the superior sex! :-)

However, I want to repeat what I said about superiority - the best analogy is dogs and humans. Because we value human lives more than dog lives, humans are superior. There could be a retarded human who is stupider than a dog and she would still be superior than the dog.

So in other words, just like with the dog analogy, you can't mistreat a dog, you can't just take a dog sitting in the bus and move it to sit in it's place (if you don't happen to own that dog), you also can't mistreat a boy or a man or take his place in the bus (if you don't happen to own that boy or man). Just because a person is male doesn't mean he needs to bow to every woman everywhere and serve her and who knows what else... I never said that! A dog also doesn't have to obey every single human, and humans are still superior to dogs.

I hope this takes away some of the fears of the equality-camp of embracing Female superiority. And guess what, when Female superiority is recognized BOTH sexes are happier because they are both in peace with their true identities and rolls. So it's not about putting down the males, it's about giving them the freedom and taking away the shame from them of being inferior, as nature made them. And it's about them too celebrating the empowerment of Women, which is beautiful, natural and great for both sexes.

What DOES Female Superiority lead to? More peaceful societies. Societies in which all are happier. Societies in which the males don't have to be worried about fulfilling a roll that is not natural for them (being dominant or leading). Societies where Females decide where those societies are going to in a collective level. Females vote. Males don't need to worry their little heads with that, even if they are very smart. Males can worry instead about pleasing the Women in their lives, making their lives gorgeous, cooking, giving them massages, being pretty for them and becoming great lovers and even sexual beings that can be used for both sexes's pleasure at the Females direction. Females can lead, vote, hold office, and enjoy the males. Females can take society to a better place, take their own families to a better place and shape and mold their own males to be better males and happier ones. Females can also be dominant, enjoy their roll as the dominant sex and in a good way and with proper limits, "abuse" the males and "exploit" them sexually, but it's all done with healthy boundaries and there is nothing wrong with it. Female Superiority is a lot better than just equality. It's meant to be, it's natural, and ask any boy in this forum, 99% of them if they are true to themselves know they are melting to see it happen. So just embrace it!

Anonymous said...

So happy you're back Ms. Kathy!
My wonderful wife requires I wear a leather collar daily as a reminder. Not sure how your John wears his but mine goes on the minute I wake up and stays on till my shower. After work, once inside the house the collar goes back on until permission is granted to remove it for bed time.
I love wearing my collar for her. It makes me feel more submissive. I have a large metal ring in the front that rattles as I move about. Sometimes my wife will grab my ring and pull me towards her for a kiss and I could just melt.
When cleaning, maybe I have not done a really good job on something (glass is the worst!) She will tighten my collar for a day or two as a reminder. I'm so happy when we go back to my "normal" spot on the buckle. It gets very warm wearing a leather collar when cleaning. If my wife happens to leave while I'm cleaning she'll lock my collar on just in case I had ideas of removing it for a spell. I love that part! There is nothing quite like your wife locking your collar on. She also locks my chastity device on as well. She slips her numbered security tag on the belt and I could just melt! Looking down seeing "her" tag is very powerful.
Anyway, just wanted to share how important a collar is to a sub/slave. I'm sure your John knows that too.
I think more men would benefit from wearing both a chastity device and a collar.

Anonymous said...

Ms. Kathy
Welcome back. I enjoy your blog and hope you continue it. Your comment about a "thing-e" gave me a chuckle. Being a man who consensually wears one I can say that in some ways it's like a collar. The lock went on a long time ago and yet my wife and I carry on like when we were lovers in college (almost for me). My wife being in charge helped to make me closer as a husband and companion. One thing we both like is the fact that family or friends have no idea about our relationship, which makes it a bit more naughty and fun.