Punishment, A Quick Aside

In the last posting the comment was made that some of the best punishments are the simplest. In that regard I would like to share a story with you about a young woman who has been reading the blog for about a year. We have emailed back and forth on a few occasions and I have gotten to know her basic situation. She and her husband are both college students living in married housing at a private university. If I read her emails correctly she is an undergraduate. Her husband is in law school. They are in what I call the experimental age. They are young, newly married, and away from the traditional restraints of family and long term friends.

Shortly before being married last year the husband came to her with a request to have something of a female led relationship. According to what she told me, 'he liked the idea of her being in control'.
The concept of her being in control was never something she ever wanted, but she was open to experimentation. In the beginning he described himself as something of a service submissive. He liked to do house hold cleaning and laundry and generally take care of things for her. The caveat was that he needed to do things at her command. In the emails she told me that she was fine with the concept. She had no problem with him cleaning the toilets and changing the bed sheets if that was what a femdom relationship was all about.

After a few months of married life he asked if she would collar him. He also asked if she would lead him through the apartment on a leash. In her words that was too wacky for her and she said no.
They did get into some femdom games, and he developed the custom of calling her mistress.
She emphasized it was all about fun and she did not take the idea of being her husband's mistress
seriously. In fact she tells me that she kind of giggled every time he called her mistress.

One part of the femdom experience she did enjoy was having her husband pick up and wash the dinner dishes. According to he emails they would sit and talk at the table until she gave him the command to pick up. He usually responded with a yes mistress type remark. She enjoyed the luxury of relaxing while he spent the ten or fifteen minutes necessary to pick up and make lunches for the next day. In a sense it gave her the feeling of what it was to be a real mistress, and there was a part of her that liked it.

A part of their femdom games involved punishment. In the beginning the so called punishment was nothing more than play. It often involved one of those play floggers that is good for show, but doesn't hurt. One a couple of occasions she wrote to me for ideas. I recommended corner time which can be a real punishment if you keep the guy on his knees long enough. I also recommended the idea of sending him to the store with a ribbon in his hair. Once or twice she went in the store after him, but pretended she didn't know who he was. It was fun to laugh at him while watching other people's reactions.  At one time he asked if he could wear some of her underwear. Her things were really too small. So, for his birthday present she took him to the plus size store to buy panties for him.
That turned out better than she expected as the young sales girl was very accommodating.

 On several occasions he  made a request to wear a chastity appliance with her as his key holder. At the time she told me that the request 'kind of' scared her. He gave her some books and mentioned a few web sites that might help her learn more about these devices. It took her a while to understand, and even then she told me that she just went along with him as the entire concept of femdom and chastity seemed so strange. They ended up buying a device on line. She told me that it actually gave her a good feeling to know that her husband was locked and that she held the key. She mainly locked him on weekends for play. To more or less sum up her comments she told me that her husband was much more attentive while wearing device so she tended to have him wear it all weekend. She also learned to link release with his grades in law school as a way of motivating him to study harder.

Yesterday evening I received a really cute email from this young lady. Along with a girlfriend she and her husband decided to attend a movie last Saturday afternoon.  On the way to the movie she instructed him on which route to take. On his own the husband decided to take another route and got the three of them stuck in heavy traffic on the expressway. When they finally arrived at the theater, she tells me, she calmly instructed her husband to hand over  his wallet, along with the keys to the car.  For not following instructions she told the husband that he would not be attending the movie with them, but would instead remain waiting on the outside of the theater. The look on the husband's face was incredible she told me. As was more or less usual for a Saturday he was wearing the chastity appliance. She then added that unless he wanted to stay locked for the for the next month he had better be there waiting there as they exited the theater.

This lady went on to tell me that he is the one who wanted a femdom type arrangement. On that day he got he got a taste of what real femdom was all about she told me. Her girlfriend thought it was a 'hoot', and they laughed about it for the rest of the afternoon while teasing him about what a good movie it was. She was not sure which part of the punishment was the most effective, the boredom of waiting, or the humiliation in front of her girlfriend.

After the movie the two girls decided to go for a drink and snacks. 'Would you like to come in with us', she asked the husband. 'Yes', he replied. She said something to the effect that she hadn't heard an apology from him. 'I'm sorry' he replied. "I'm Sorry who", she made a point of answering in front of her friend. "I'm sorry, Mistress." he nervously answered with a bow of his head. From what she tells me the girlfriend was more than a little surprised by the exchange, and they latter shared a giggle at the husband's expense.

In the restaurant she couldn't help but talk about the experience with her girlfriend. 'He really wants you to boss him around', the girlfriend asked on several occasions. Her feeling was that in a strange sought of way her husband was really enjoying the humiliation of being totally outed in front of this friend. Once, when he started to speak, she showed him the key and told him to be quite while the women were talking. 'Yes mistress', he responded.  She even took the step of ordering for him. My interpretation of the experience was that it put the husband into a deep state of 'sub space' where by he was totally under his wife's authority. On that Saturday afternoon this couple was not playing at femdom as she was really the one who was in control. She had the courage to use her female authority in a way that taught her husband a useful lesson about obedience. She pressed the envelope in a way that her husband never expected.

Can any of you relate to this experience?


Love you all for reading.


Kathy