While, I can't believe it has been two weeks since returning from Becky's home.
In my absence John did an excellent job of keeping up with the housework and with the special task given to him. He was responsible for painting one of our bedrooms, polishing several pieces of furniture and making one or two small improvements in the garden. Before leaving for the trip, Carole, our next door neighbor teasingly remarked that she would keep an eye on him while I was away. I teasingly responded that yes please do so in that John needs supervision. We then shared a giggle at John's expense, but she has no idea of the degree of supervision he is subject to.
On our first coffee break upon returning I asked Carole if John was a good boy during my absence. At that moment he was in hearing rang tidying up the kitchen from breakfast. The slight blush on his face told me that he was just a little embarrassed, but he also loves that type of 'outing' in front of Miss Carole. And, for John it is Miss Carole. She, of course does not know many of the details of our relationship, but she does know that in our household John does what he is told. What I have observed in our recent visit is that Becky has become more secure with small 'outings' or what might be descried as public displays of submission. She has become quite comfortable with having him carry her purse. 'He catches a few looks', she told me, but he handles these situations
with a great deal of maturity.
When Becky mentioned the word maturity it gave me the idea for this posting. Yes, in my judgment submissive men who know what they want and need are mature as individuals. Yes, I do believe men mature later than women, and many men never reach the maturity levels of their wives. Yet, many of them do mature and when they gain that understanding of who they are as people make wonderful husbands and fathers. What many people forget is that it takes a high degree of inner strength to live a life style that cherishes obedience and service to another person. And, on the other side of the coin it takes a woman who has the inner courage to take charge of her man in the way Becky has with her guy.
Love you all for reading. Love you all for the comments. What I would like each of you to remember is that it takes a strong man to obey a woman. Be proud of who you are. If your wife has you carry her purse in the mall or into restaurants do it with pride. Most other man will be envious of you.
Why that couldn't be me they will think.
Love you all,
Kathy
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24 comments:
Thank you for posting, and for your thoughts.
If Femdom is a growing counter culture, perhaps we can expect more and more "outings" in public.
Tim
Most men in my neck of the world would scorn and ridicule a man who was carrying his partner's handbag (purse)
John
I think it would do wonderful things for my wife’s confidence to put me in public or with her friends. While I don’t relish that my ego is not important and thanks to my wife is quietly disappearing. Thanks Kathy Steve
Not too long ago, I would have never imagined I would be wearing panties everyday out of reverence and submission to my wife. But here I am doing just that. For better or worse, it's a big part of who I am, and it's not going away. It feels hollow to lead a double life, that's why I don't mind at all getting outed, though, the pace of that kind of thing is all up to her. When it happens, it's impossible to feel like there's anything to apologize for, given the craziness society has already allowed. If police officers are going to kneel for a certain famous drug using career criminal porn star just because he's black, then kneeling for your legitimately super hero wife seems rather benign.
Joel
Dear Mistress Kathy,
The little "humiliation" of carrying my wife's purse is something she's never wanted or needed except when her hands were full of children. The one thing that she truly loves is not letting me order when we go out to eat. She may tell the waiter/waitress that i am not allowed to talk to them, or anyone but her. This puts all the attention on her and she loves that. i, too enjoy the little culture switch and minor "humiliation" that goes along with it. This is 180 degrees different from how we were raised and shocks many. Others, take it in stride like that is the way relationships go and they are just fine with that.
Just thought i'd share a bit. Hope You all are having a great day.
larry
Ms Kathy
Wow it's been so long.
I love this post. I think putting males in situations that out them is a big and needed step for Femdom to become a more accepted lifestyle. I want to connect this with a subject you touched once which is coming up again.
You said men should vote the way their wives direct them to. You also had John, your slave, serve in a Women's only political gathering. As election time in the USA comes closer, I want to take a deeper look at this. I think it's time for men to be outed as supporters of these ideas. It can start with something as innocent as wearing a t shirt that says that families should vote together but makes it explicit that is the way the wife wants to all the way staying a "politics is for Females" group and let the Women decide what that means. For me it means that ideally men don't vote it get voted, they support the Women who do instead. Today where we live in a society that men do vote it makes sense that they vote as their wife directs them to, but ideally they should be able to just let their Wife take their vote at the ballot. I think many submissive men would line up with this. I also think it would make the Female vote much more valuable and would empower Women a lot more than just being head of the household - politics would finally reflect Female values and the world would be much much much better off. I would love your input in this idea but more in how we can use elections to out men as being Female led
The way a couple are dressed is also a way to show others the power dynamics in a couple. I once saw a couple in a mall probably in their 30s where the Woman was dressed smartly in a business suit and high heels while her husband was wearing a Powerpuff Girls t-shirt and high cut athletic shorts with slippers. The way she was holding his hand leading him around while he was carrying all the shopping bags also made it clear who was in charge.
Mistress Kathy
Thank you for your post. i was relieved to learn John had projects while you were away and Miss Carol occasionally checked on him. The Mistress/Wife and i discussed "outings" and we have a question. Does John address your neighbor as "Miss Carol"? We have small outings such as preparing Her coffee in restaurants. (You remember restaurants back before Covid) However, we both thought addressing the neighbor as Miss Carol was a BIG outing.
jj
The topic of "outings" reminds me of an idea I came across awhile back. Femdom couples socializing with other Femdom couples. If such a group socialized in a public setting (a city park comes to mind) they would demonstrate a Femdom society in miniature. Such as men openly obeying women. Image the impression that may have on young girls. (and perhaps some boys).
Tim
That was a good point about clothing. There is something about a woman in her suit that says Authority Figure.
Hi, it doesn’t make sense but I hope my wife will out me with her friends or our friends. Perhaps then it it will give me more freedom to serve her as she deserves? Submissive men should be proud and encourage each other. D&S
Mistress decided to let me be in charge for a day not too long ago..well, it was nerve -racking. it didn't feel right at all & soon I was on my knees begging to be Her slave again. Lady R sd, " I knew this would happen" & put my collar on me, then told me to "go put your kilt & white shirt on"..I did as I was told. When i got back She had the dog harnessed up for a walk..Our 19 yo daughter walked the dog & Mistress walked me. It was dusk & She made sure to walk by Miss Stella's. Mistress stopped to talk, She pointed to the dog & sd "Sit!". She pointed to me & sd "kneel"..Miss Stella invited us in..I knelt next to Mistress..The women drank beer & I was given chamomile tea b/c Mistress sd, "he has a lot of work tomorrow.."
i was meant to be Her slave & will never question that again..
We try not to let our fedom lifestyle show in public. After a few years you don’t realize you are acting different. Several times over the years people we know and people we have just met will take my wife off to the side and ask how she trained her husband so well. Stay safe- Alan
Mistress Kathy,
"...it takes a strong man to obey a woman..."
I think my software is outdated, so I don't believe I can post a link. But I came across an interesting post by a man who chose to submit to his wife. See:
City-data.com
Being "submissive" in relationships...
Page 4
post #33 by jumbms
He made an important point that though he has chosen to submit to his wife, that doesn't mean that he will submit to anybody else. I think that there is a certain breed of man who may surprise you if you assume that they are weak. These men may have a inborn tendency to obey a certain breed of women, but that doesn't mean they will submit to anybody else.
We really need a new post on these comments
My late wife was always protective of our privacy in our home town as I'm somewhat well known due to my job here. However, when we would travel, she would be less concerned and would enjoy "outing" me just a little. Two things I recall: we were in another state and drove by a huge outlet mall and we thought we'd take a break and visit the stores there. In a Maidenform store, she said "let's get you some new panties while we're here," a LITTLE more loudly than she needed to, I thought. *blush* She picked out four panties for me and as we walked to the counter, she saw a sign which said we'd get a free pair of panties if we bought five pair. At the counter, she said (so the clerk could here) "oh, look, honey. Go pick out one more pair for you and then find a pair in my size that matches your favorite of your new ones. I'll be in that cooking store across the mall." The clerk grinned as I turned 8 shades of red and picked out the ones I was told to get. "Oh, I think she'll think you made a good choice on the matching pair," she said with a smile.
One other time we were on the other coast and she had locked up my privates, wearing the key to the lock as a necklace. In an elevator another gal saw the key and casually asked what it was for. "Oh, something very important that I like to keep locked up when we travel," was all she said. I think my blushing MAY have given it away.
As always, thanks so much for your thoughtful and insightful writing. It's a joy to read and a pleasure to remember the relationship my loving wife and I had for so many years.
Mark
Mistress Kathy,
"...it takes a strong man to obey a woman."
It also takes a man who is loyal to that woman. And I think that loyalty is something that makes Femdom workable.
In some blogs I have noticed that the viability of Femdom is questioned. It tends to come down to a matter of physical force. How can a woman truly be in charge if a man can easily over power her?
Consider whether a Femdom relationship is a loving relationship. If a man starts to feel affection for a woman, might he also start to become loyal to her?
Tim
If a Femdom community should form, will men be loyal to it? If so, I think that Femdom will be even more viable.
Tim
Mistress Kathy, I believe that I am starting to see patterns in Femdom.
In reference to Quora-What Are The Experiences Of Men/Women In A FLR (Female Led Relationship)?
One respondent, Caroline No, commented that an FLR is the safest relationship for a woman. Because the woman makes the rules and sets the boundaries.
Another respondent, Wilma Cray, went into considerable depth. Some key points she made:
1. A man can get great satisfaction in-willingly-yielding to his wife.
2. The relationship needs to be rooted in love, respect, and trust.
3. A man typically does not lose his masculinity in an FLR.
4. The submissive streak may be deep rooted and "incurable".
5. There are women who were reluctant to try an FLR, but have come to prefer it.
Quoting Wilma Cray:
"My husband is not weak. Submission does not equate to weakness. It is actually something that takes a great deal of courage to do. True submission comes from a place of strength, not weakness. It is a gift given, it isn't a sign of weakness; submission can never be taken, it can only be given."
I'm thinking that some men are born with a gift, a gift to be shared. Shared, however, only with women. In competition with other males, these men may be fully functional and appear to conform to traditional masculinity. (The qualification because patriarchal assumptions will be abandoned in an FLR). And if such men are competitive, that implies that Femdom can be a success in the real world.
Tim
Mistress Kathy,
There are hints that something akin to military discipline is emerging. slave billy's comments got me thinking along these lines.
This concerns commands for movements of the male body. Quite specific movements. slave billy, for example, was told to kneel. Another example that comes to mind is the Command Position.
Trying to think of something comparable, the military immediately came to mind. Consider orders to march, or to come to attention, etc.
Tim
Please tell us more about how your time has been lately. How has coming out of quarantine been?
Even though you don't post so often I bless you with love
"Men can not resist the power of a confident assertive woman who is willing to take charge." (Mistress Kathy, Oct. 23, 2018).
Yes, the directives from such a woman can be compelling. And I think that some of us men have almost a compulsion to obey women. Call this a gift, or perhaps a talent, because we males can find purpose in enabling Female Empowerment.
Tim
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