Based on the lack of comments the last postings were of little interest to most of you. Still, I appreciate both of you, Larry and Joel, for responding. You are both sweethearts. Thank you very much for sharing, and here is a big internet kiss for both of you.
One of the things that concerns women about femdom is the role of men in their most important relationship. As Joel describes it he is a Cowering and Groveling submissive husband to his mistress wife. Upon reading this comment the immediate thought came to me was how many women want a cowering, submissive man as a husband. Yet, submissive men have a way a turning themselves into this type of a person. It is one thing for a man to see himself as a follower. It is quite another thing for a man to debase himself as a collared slave who jumps every time his mistress wife waives her hand or snaps her fingers. Yet again, this is the way many men see themselves. A part of it is fantasy, but a big part of it is real. Believe me, I know, because my own husband lives as one of these loving but obedient slaves.
On my first visit with Tara I came into contact with a few of her so called houseboys. These were all older mature men who wore nothing but the thinnest of lacy panties, who bowed and graveled, and dared not speak unless spoken to. Was I offended by male nudity on that first visit. No, but was I concerned that my husband had become one of these men. Yes, of couse. It took me quite a while to understand how men could act this way. Why would a grown man debase himself in this way, I wondered. The answer lies deep down in their psychic. There is an inner need to serve women, to obey women, and worship the ground that they walk on. After a while I came to realize that there was no real need for me to understand male submissive behavior, but simply learn to live with it and adjust to it.
Living as a mistress to a man in a committed relationship that requires a certain amount of diligence. Yes, no matter how sweet the male partner may be it is still a relationship that requires work. There is always a need for a wife to be willing tp punish. Yes, John was punished for his recent indiscretion.
Many of you will be happy to know that he has since been forgiven.
Love you for reading,
Kathy
Hi Kathy,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your post.
Yes, submissive men have a deep down desire to serve their partner, and I don't understand why it is there. It just is. My wife accepts it, and enjoys it.
AdoresHisWife
That Lady referred to in the last Conversations in has quite the household. It reminds me of "Nancy and Dennis" from the Worshipping Your Wife blog. There, Dennis is submissive to his Mother-in-law, Susan, and his former protege-now-boss, Carol, in a different way than he is to his wife. Perhaps the husband needs some time to contemplate, otherwise a chore like taking out the trash becomes simply a chore. Are you implying she should take on a "lover" to keep him on his toes? Perhaps he helps her get ready for a dinner out, something requiring a little black dress and heels. Stepdaughter is off somewhere and he's puttering around the house. He get a call to pick up the wife, and her "date" was simply a dinner with the daughter. On the ride back he hears them whispering from the back seat. And he knows who he's ultimately submissive to.
ReplyDelete- In Boston
Kathy,
ReplyDeleteThank you for the words. I do find that any hint of myself being a drain or burden on my wife in any situation causes me to feel enormous guilt. I suppose that's why I'm somebody else's bottom in the first place. The guilt I feel from her having the burden being in charge of me is very real for me. I regret I can't move mountains for her but that guilt has some good parts. It does drive me to love her as sacrificially as I possibly can and to put aside my own selfish, petty interests. Also, it keeps me humble and my feet firmly planted on the ground. I have become convinced that for the two of us, any hint of ego on my part causes problems for us, and besides it's liberating for her to not have to feed and stroke that ego.
Joel
I think there are different men and different reasons for submissive men: For exemple our my insights.
ReplyDeleteAlso my wife feels the burden of beeing in charge. But she likes also to have an attentive husband. For me the real problem is: sexuality is not in her first interest. - Myself I do not crave for followingto her orders. But I am really interested in her wellbeing. If I feel to be in her focus it helps me to give up my selfish behavior and to put her interest in the middle of my daily life and motivation. Some peaks of her sexual power or some experience of punishments would be the pepper in our relationsship. And I would still be a strong and responsible man!
Greetings and thanks for the conversation. Peter
Mistress Kathy, I have been struck by the quality of the recent posts, and of the comments -- but lazily have not taken the trouble to thank you for providing this wonderful resource for subhusbands like me and so many others like me. I,too, thought subguyinAtl "poured his heart out in an elegant manner." You continue to attract a very thoughtful and loyal readership. And, of course, as the father of an assertive daughter (now 26), who enjoys bossing me around when she is at home, I was interested to read the anecdote about the dominant wife who enjoyed the relief of putting her own adult daughter in occasional charge of her subhusband. I can relate, because my daughter is much more likely to order me to clean her room or fetch something than is my wife -- but then I have been fetching things for my daughter since she was in diapers.
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