Special Posting for I'm Hers

Back when I was a young teenager my father worked in what we use to call the business district. Often times I would meet him after work. It would be great fun. He would often take me to one of the places where he went to have a beer and raw oysters with his buddies. He would buy me a sandwich. I didn't  like the taste of the oysters. Dad would tell me that  raw oysters were an 'acquired' taste. As I grew a little older, tried them a few more times, they began to taste good.

In my mind the 'taste', or if you will the desire for a femdom relationship is a lot like oysters. As young girls we didn't grow up with the idea that obedience was expected from a husband. If anything, we grew up with the idea that women were expected to please their man. Looking out at the world I don't see too many femdom relationships that started with the wife wanting her husband to serve her. If anything, just from reading the blogs, it is the guys who initiate the femdom portion of the relationships. The women, if they agree to it, generally come along kicking and screaming. For the most part the few women who do decide to take the reigns of their marriage do it to please their men.

My introduction to femdom came like a bolt of lighting from the sky. For me a mistress was a women who slept with a married man. Aside from old jokes about hen pecked men, I had no idea there were women in the world that demanded true obedience from their husbands. In my mind any man who allowed himself to be dominated by a women was some how mentally sick. Working with Tara made me realize that male submissive behavior was not sick, but very normal in many men. Some more than others. It also made me realize that a man's need for female control in his daily life goes much deeper  than a fetish. It is, in fact, a deep seated need that if denied would leave most submissive men with a vast emptiness in their lives.

Coming to understand that John was not weird for needing female control  was a major first step for me. Femdom was not something I wanted. I did not grow up expecting to be my husband's mistress. Nor was I excited about the prospect of having a man slave for me. When John first came home it was almost like one extended session. He slept in the kennel, he crawled from room to room. It was not a lifestyle that any married couple could maintain for long. I don't want John to ask permission every time he needs to use the bathroom. Yes, if we are at the dinner table, I like the idea of a man asking permission to be excused.
Yes, in a restaurant, I expect John to stand if I leave the  table, push in my chair, and pull it out when I return.
He will also wear a small collar under his shirt to remind him that he is property of another.

In the  beginning, when John first came home, it was me doing things for him. On a fundamental level John needed to understand that I was going to be his mistress, and he was going to serve and obey me. It was still not something I really wanted, except as a way saving the marriage with the man I loved. Through Tara I was introduced to a small group of women in the life style. With the commonality of having slave husbands we bonded. We talked together, we laughed together, and told one other about our relationships.

Each of these women had been in a femdom relationship for at least a couple of years. In most ways these women were proud of their husbands. They would brag about how obedient their guy had been that week, or what a good job he had done cleaning the house. In a very short amount of time, I wanted my John to be as good of a servant for me as their husbands were for them. Just as their husband dropped to the floor, anytime any place, at the snap of the fingers, I wanted John to willingly display the same high level of obedience. In so many ways Liz was my early mentor.

In the blog I have often talked about the trip to New York. That was the trip in which I punished John by having him wear a big, yellow ribbon in his hair. That trip was a watershed in our relationship. That punishment was not for him. It was not to give him a thrill. Wearing the ribbon in front of other males, dealing with the cat calls, and the sneers from other men  was a deeply humiliating experience for him. That punishment was for me. It was my way, as a mistress wife to express my extreme displeasure  for the way he talked back to me. From that day forward we both  understood that a fundamental shift had occurred in our relationship. John understood that he was really a slave who was owned by his wife, and completely subject to her authority. For my part I understood that I liked being the mistress wife. I learned that I liked demanding a high level of respect from my husband. I learned that I liked expecting my man to give me complete and total obedience. Yes, I had acquired the taste.

Mistress